I mean, I don't really know where to start in summarising this week, shall we just let it unfurl? This is quite a lengthy post so I would suggest getting snacks.
So Mr Miller had a week off, Monday started out rainy, grey and dull but by the afternoon it cleared up enough for a little dog walk in the park. Well this was a mistake, I forgot it was the school holidays and it was just rammed. We came home, picked up a few bits for dinner and the journey the next day (my current staples; popcorn, gluten free digestives, bananas). Had a little bit of dinner as I was too nervous to eat, we then watched Eden (more on this later) and went to bed.
On Monday evening I encouraged you to start your own blog, so many of your reacted positively and I hope you will be sending me the links to your new sites soon!
Tuesday - I barely slept on Monday night, I realised I didn't have a swimsuit for our impending adventure and needed to probably go in to town searching for one. Michael had said that for our first night away we can get a night holdall...I know what I had in mind.
I dragged myself out of bed, chucked some make up on and decided to take the day one step at a time. Step one, go in to town. Easy. On this occasion we were going in at about 11 on a Tuesday and there were roadworks which made the traffic almost standstill. I wasn't in the mood for it and my anxiety started to rise. We finally got parked and then to the shops. I needed jeans and swim wear. Can you think of worst shopping items? Ugh. I think we went to four or five shops but just couldn't find anything so opted for a slutty Love Island-esque number from New Look. I bought a bath bomb from Lush and had a little wander round Oliver Bonas.
After we had been there Michael took me to Mulberry and we chose an overnight bag together. Technically it is for the both of us to enjoy and my argument for fitting everything in a Large Lily wasn't sticking. Slightly more relaxed, we picked up some food for Michael then headed home. I had a bath to try and calm myself then started to get everything for a night away. I do not pack light. It had been torrential all day and I wasn't sure what to pack, 3 outfits and loungewear later I was sorted.
3pm and we were leaving. We had to drop my house keys at my sisters so she could collect and look after Atticus, this threw Michaels sat nav off and he started driving the wrong way to the very meticulous route I had planned. I shouted that he was going the wrong way and he assured me he wasn't. I started to panic as I knew the way he was going would take us on to the ring road, and then...on to the M1. That was not happening, so I asked him to pull over and I cried whilst explaining. We realised what had happened, we used my phone to get us back on track. Whilst my anxiety peaked to about an 8 I still thankfully wasn't in panic attack territory. I just wanted to get there. 30 minutes later (and the furthest I have travelled this year). We arrived.
This was a press trip for work (should I be labelling this as sponsored?) so we had a tour around the house and grounds before checking in to our room, there will be a post on So You're Getting Married about it so I won't go in to too much detail on here. We checked in to our room around 5ish and I was wiped out. I got in to the exceptionally comfy bed, Michael put some Friends on the TV, made me a tea and I had a little nap before dinner.
I was going to go for a massage/swim in my slutty bathing suit but I fell asleep within minutes. Dinner was lovely and I actually had some food. Delicious hake with tomato salad. We got back to the room, watched Make or Break (trashy ch5 programme) in the bath. The bath bomb I chose was a terrible decision as it expelled a ginormous amount of seaweed and we were paranoid it was going to block the 18th century drains. We spent 90% of our relaxing soak scooping out inch long bits of greenery from the bottom of the bath and questionable crevices.
We got out, put on fluffy robes and jumped in to bed to watch Eden. I was obsessed with this programme when it aired last year. Strangers trying to live as a community on a desolate island in Scotland. The scenery was breathtaking, the people seemed so competent and I couldn't wait to see how they would last a year. They stopped showing the documentary after about 4 episodes, we weren't even in to Spring yet. Its because the whole experiment went to shit. The community turned evil and it all went a bit Lord of the Flies. Every day this week they showed what happened with interviews from the Islanders. Catch up on channel 4, it was terrific TV.
I made myself a hot water bottle (helps me sleep with the ulcer pain) popped Harry Potter on my phone and tried to sleep. It was weird being in another bed, in another room, miles from home. I never truly settled and to be honest, as lovely as it was, I was just looking forward to going home but also anxious about the journey. To my surprise I ended up sleeping quite well. I think this was due to how shattered my brain was and because the bed was so big I wasn't touching Miller's sweaty body.
Wednesday - We woke around 9am for breakfast in the room, I had a little bit of nutella on gf toast. Average. Miller had full english. It had stopped raining so after we were dressed we checked out and then had a wander around the pretty grounds.
We left around 10.30 and by 11.10 I was back on my sofa having a berocca and banana. As I was holiday also I decided to use the week to redo the bathroom a bit. If we are moving then there is no point us ripping out and replacing so I popped to Wickes to get everything I needed.
I opted for standard matt white every where to refresh the walls, I painted the bath in Farrow and Ball Peignoir, a really pretty delicate dirty pale pink. I then painted the floorboards white to match the guest room next door. The room feels so much brighter and fresher already. I still have the tiling to sort but that will be done next week. I bought a bit of frippery online which I am waiting to arrive.
To be honest, I don't know where I was finding the energy from to do this after so much exposure. It finally hit me on Thursday and I felt so unwell, very tired and my stomach ulcers were flaring up. I spent Thursday and Friday mainly watching films and TV series but it was so nice having Michael home who looked after me in between his gaming sessions!
On Saturday I finished off the bathroom woodwork and some cute planters had arrived from Amazon.
I've ordered another little plant which should be arriving soon. I watched Atypical on Netflix, very much enjoyed, and pottered about the garden as we decided on having a chill day.
I've really got back in to cooking the last few days so I have been revisiting some favourites and trying to figure out if I can amend the recipe to fit my reactive bowels. Most of Nigel Slater's (and probably my fave kitchen bae) can be so I look forward to cooking from his books soon. I think a lot of my photography inspiration comes from his Kitchen Diaries series.
Sunday. Oh you babe. We finally had some sunshine, I had a little lie in, made us breakfast and then we did a few chores. In the after we headed up to my mother in laws land because I wanted to have a look through the hedgerows and see what was or will be on offer. We found blackberries, sloes, rosehips, elder, hazlenuts, crab apples, apples, plums, damons and some red looking berries that were weren't too sure about.
We took Atticus up, slightly nervous about him and the horses, but they both loved each other and Indie took a particular interest in the little guy.
A lot of the fruits will be ready in another week or two so we left with a bag full of potatoes, happy hearts. And a dog that stunk of fox shit. On arriving home, we had dinner. Sans potato, and sat down to watch Peaky Blinders ( I know we are late to the party, 2014 kind of late). Enjoying so far.
This week has been so mixed, one minute I felt on top of the world conquering my fears, the next, my stomach had reduced me to watching Modern Family reruns in the foetal position in bed. Is this the same for everyone? Are your weeks ever consistent? I worry about going away for longer in case I don't feel well. Especially at the moment when things are so up and down. In saying that, I am super proud of my night away, it made going to the land anxiety rating 3/10 which is just crazy. Thank you all so much for your lovely messages on instagram, I know to so so many of you this is something you don't understand but your words of encouragement mean a lot!
Who knows what will happen this week hey?