Phoebe MillerComment

The Weekend Edit #52

Phoebe MillerComment
The Weekend Edit #52

Merry Autumn! The clocks have gone back, we have had the first few frosty mornings and I am so happy about the shift in season.

Ugh this week was such a weird one, one day was great then the next was just super shit for no other reason than my, myself and my over thinking mind. We last left each other on Tuesday last week and actually, I was doing relatively OK.

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Wednesday morning I woke up to such a sore stomach, I think I have mentioned before but my tummy is my achilles heel. I would drag my body out with a migraine but give me a dodgy tummy and I am not leaving my house, which is actually where my agoraphobia/travel anxiety stems from or has resulted in. Which ever way you want to look at that. With mums bowel cancer going undiagnosed for over a decade and my sister walking round undiagnosed for years also my brain went straight down the health anxiety route of “this pain means something is wrong”. My rational brain knows its most likely nothing but I am feeling so mentally fragile and its not taking much to knock me at the moment.

All of Wednesday and Thursday I went in to cocoon mode, thankfully the brand that was meant to come and test shoot cancelled, and I had my therapy over the phone from bed. By Thursday evening I was feeling a little better, the cramps had calmed down a bit and I wasn’t mentally focusing on it as much. I know why my body was feeling so angry and stressed but it never takes away from the actual physical pain experienced.

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Friday morning and I had a doctors appointment to talk over my current medication, dr also said anything gastro I am experiencing is anxiety related (cool, ok). Later that morning I had a meeting with a client for Simply Social, it was with a lady who’s dresses I actually tried on whilst planning my own wedding, so it was quite amazing to have her in my living room discussing everything social media/instagram/blogging.

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Saturday was our chill and chore day. I was still feeling out of sorts but better than I had in the week so I was feeling more positive. My meeting had gone really well, and I did an insta takeover for a cool interiors instagram page on Friday evening and I had some lovely messages across the 24 hours about it, so that perked me up. When chores were done I settled down to watch new Sabrina on Netflix, I can tell you not to bother. I got a shit vibe after 1 episode but continued till episode 4 then gave up. Not that good, and a lot of you agreed on insta. Switched to The Informer which was very good and then Gremlins.

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Sunday, my anxiety was feeling better, therefore my tummy was, so I had a bath, did myself up and we went food shopping followed by a pit stop at the pub. Realised I hadn’t actually been to the pub since July, was lovely to be back there. I had a Silent Pool and ginger beer and then we nipped back home due to fridged goods in the car. Dropped everything off then Atticus and I went for a very pretty autumnal walk. That evening I went over to a neighbours/new friends house for wine, and questionable Italian liqueur before coming home and catching up on Strictly. Think it was obvious Seann was going wasn’t it?

It is now Tuesday morning and I am finishing this off whilst waiting for Michael to come back from the vets and the Virgin guy to get here (anytime between 8-12…yawn). Couldn’t upload this last night because our internet keeps dipping in and out. Atticus at the vets because he has been having really bizarre breathing issues over the last couple of days and this morning I woke up to him really snorting whilst he was inhaling, no idea what is wrong, a lot suggested kennel cough but he’s not coughing? He does sound congested though so I do think its something a long those lines. Anyway, this has spiked my anxiety back up because I just don’t think my heart could deal with my best bud being poorly right now so he better just have a simple doggy cold!!

 this was us at 7am this morning - your dogs poop tells you so much about how they are!

this was us at 7am this morning - your dogs poop tells you so much about how they are!

In the mean time I am replying to some SYGM emails and also a few for Simply Weekend, I have been gifted a couple of lovely things that I need to photograph for instagram, one being the most amazing perfume from Penhaligon’s. I am also writing up a blog post for here about my top TV series ever which I have just had to update to include a new one! Hoping to get that up tomorrow, internet permitting!

Other stuff going on in my world; we have a date for my sisters surgery to remove the cancer which is the 7th. I’m starting to vaguely get used to the idea that I can’t avoid Christmas so should really start planning it a bit. Its going to be my mums birthday soon and I have a nice idea for it but keep putting off planning it because then it makes it all a bit real but I know I will regret not doing my idea. I should have a new door being installed this week, its pink. Obvs.

*waits till Michael gets back to update you*

Ok he’s back! We have a pup with a temperature/fever so they think it’s some kind of bacterial infection. He’s been given some antibiotics, and has another check up next week. We actually took him a while ago for a wheeze (think in Feb) and they think its laid dormant and now that its got cold and perhaps with a lowered immune system the virus has come back :( So extra cuddles and love for him till he feels better!

Virgin also arrived whilst he was out and internet it fixed, kind of. For now.